Roommates

I have three of them. They are awesome girls and I enjoy living with them. But no matter how much you like your roommates, there are always those dreaded issues.

Cleaning - This is hard when you have four people living in an apartment who all have cleaning on very different places on their list of priorities. One person does all the cleaning. Another person does zero cleaning. One person never does their dishes. Another person has clutter all over the apartment. No one is every happy.

Then there’s visitors. I have a lot of visitors. We all do, actually. It really isn’t an issue now. But in college I had roommates who thought it would be okay to let their boyfriends move in before consulting the other girls living in the apartment. I had another roommate who would have loud parties at our place on weeknights when the rest of us were trying to sleep.

There are other things too… pets, food, bills… PMS… I’ve had roommates who have stolen from us, roommates who have been at war with each other, and roommates that would borrow things without asking… and I’d never see the stuff again.

So is living with other people really worth all of the issues? Wouldn’t it be so much better to spend a little more money on rent to have some privacy?

In my mind… yes, it’s worth it, and no, it wouldn’t be better. I love having roommates. When I first moved away after college, I lived in a studio apartment by myself. I only lasted three months before I HAD to get an apartment with other people. I couldn’t stand the quiet. I didn’t like having no one to make dinner with. I hated being by myself all of the the time.

There are a lot of living options when you are in your twenties. You can live by yourself. You can live with your family. You can live with roommates. You can live with your significant other.

Who do you live with? Do you prefer having roommates or living by yourself? What was your best living situation? Your worst? How do you feel about living with a boyfriend/girlfriend? Let’s discuss!

25 Responses to “Roommates”

  1. Scribbles says:

    I live with my parents (awww, sad face for Scribbles) but with me being a poor student and mum being sick, it’s the best situation for all of us at the moment. My graduating should hopefull coincide with mum’s remission and then it will be sayonara parental home! I’ve done the living with friends, living alone, living with strangers and living with a boyfriend thing and they’ve all been different. I think the case with all of them is finding a situation which is comfortable for you. Living with the boyfriend didn’t work so well because he was a night shifter and I was a nine-to-fiver. I’ve had friends that it did work flatting with and ones that it didn’t. Best flat ever was with Gothica and Muzz, one friend and one stranger, personalities that just jelled really well :D I miss them…

  2. Jordyn says:

    I live with my parents. Considering I’m only working a few hours a week there’s no way I could move out, especially considering I live in one of the most expensive places in the US. I look forward to eventually moving out and being on my own (with roommates? without? I’m not sure) but I don’t know when that will be.

  3. Carrie says:

    Right now I would love to live by myself. Unfortunately I can’t remotely afford it. I live with two other girls. They’re great and lovely and we keep out of each other’s way, and we get on fine. But it’s the little things that drive me crazy. The cleaning, as mentioned. We’ve been there two years and I don’t think one of them has cleaned the bathroom in that whole time. It’s always me. They don’t take out the recycling or rubbish. They don’t know how to work the heating. I’m trying to learn to just let it go.

    The worst place I lived was a dump, and though the people were nice enough it was a mistake. Loud parties, gross living areas. And I found a maggot in my pasta. Ugh. So by comparison my current situation is divine.

    But I would love a place that’s just mine, that I can decorate how I like, come home knowing everything will be exactly where I left it. If only I had more money…

  4. Jenn says:

    I live with two boys who were my friends from high school. We get along very well, with the sole point of contention being the cleaning. I like a clean house, they do not. I wouldn’t trade living with them for anything, though, because they really help make our place feel like home. On the rare occasion that I’m home alone for the whole night, I feel lonely and anxious. I don’t think I’d like living on my own.

    For a while, I was living with my boyfriend, too. We all got along great, until the two of us broke up. I would like to live with my next boyfriend, but only if there’s a future with the guy.

  5. Little Miss Moneybags says:

    I live alone, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. After 10 years of roommate situations, I was just DONE. I pay more than 50% of my income to rent, but it’s totally worth it. I am calmer, saner, and happier, and this year, it was a sacrifice that needed to be made.

    My boyfriend and I plan to move in together “in the future” but whether that’s in two months or twelve is still up in the air.

  6. Arielle says:

    I live with my friend from high school but it works out well because we’re both pretty respectful. Also, she’s hardly ever home because her boyfriend lives close by so I get the benefit of not paying for my own full apartment but still get to be alone a lot of the time.

  7. lily says:

    I live with roommates - 3 other girls. I used to really want to live alone and thought that I should at some point in my life, but the more I keep living with other people, the more I really enjoy it. I enjoy making dinner, watching TV together in the evenings, running errands, dealing with house-stuff together. Yes, there are issues sometimes as one of my roommates is a clean freak and I’m more… well, not. I’m not a slob, but I’m a bit more laid back about things. I think it’s worth it. The cheaper rent and the fun…

  8. bethie says:

    If you can afford it, I think everyone should live alone for at least some period of time. I’ve been doing it for a loooooong time now and while at first I found myself sometimes lonely, it has really taught me that I enjoy my own company, and I feel like other people enjoy being around me because I’m ok with being around me.

    That said, I think I might be willing to try living with an SO at some point…gradually.

  9. Shaba says:

    I’ve lived by myself. I’ve lived with a boy. I’ve lived with 2 girls. I’ve sorta lived with a boyfriend.

    I think it depends on the person. I LOVED living with my male roommate. He soon became one of my best friends. Now I live with two girls, only one of whom is every around, but I love her to death. I despised living alone, actually I think it contributed to a flirtation with eating disorders. I don’t think I could live alone again, not good for my mental health.

  10. Princess Pointful says:

    I live with my boyfriend right now (which I just wrote about last week). Before that, I lived alone, which I adored, actually. I’m a pretty social and busy person, so I can use some downtime.

  11. Hazel says:

    After having horrible roommates (people I didn’t know) my senior year in college, I vowed to never have roommates again. I moved into a studio 2 weeks after I graduated and it was the best decision of my life! I will honestly never live with other people again unless a. i have to due to financial reasons or b. i get engaged/married. I think living alone is something everyone should experience in their lifetime!

  12. Renee says:

    I live with my significant other. I enjoy having someone around, though I wish I had lived alone in college. But living with the beau is really really nice, especially because we moved to a new city where we know NO ONE. It helps having him around.

  13. EmmaElizabeth says:

    I live alone and LOVE IT. Granted I liked having roommates in the past, but I really love that everything is mine here. I had a few bad roommates too (like my last one) so I’m enjoying my one bdrm apt. Although with roommates I used to be a nazi about everything being clean, but now that it’s just me- it can get kinda messy. And I thought maybe I’d get lonely sometimes- but nope! I’m talking to people all day long and so having some time to myself is nice. This isn’t to say I would never have a roommate again, its just been nice for now to live alone.

  14. well-intentioned heartbreaker says:

    since moving out of my parents house, i’ve lived with roommates, by myself, and with a significant other.

    roommates rawk. even when you fight, its fun (for a while) to live with PEOPLE. i moved to a new town when i was 17, and moved into a townhouse with two girls i didn’t know.. which was great for 3 days, and then one of them decided she hated me. the other one was oh so lovely, but ooooh the little bugger that hated me sucked. i’d wake up in the morning to notes on the kitchen white board, of her complaints about me. ‘we have thin walls, i can hear you on the phone late at night.’ etc, etc, etc. all i ever wanted to do was write messages back - ‘buy earplugs, bitch’ but i never did. i just laughed at the fact that we couldn’t stand each other, which made things go at least somewhat smoothly. at least we all cleaned up after ourselves?

    from there i went to living alone, which again, rawwwwwwked. i LOVED having my own space, and the fact that i could saunter from my bedroom to the bathroom to the kitchen naked if i pleased.

    and finally, i went from living alone to living with my girlfriend. we’re coming up on 2.5 years of living together, and clearly its the best living situation of all.

  15. s'mat says:

    Hmmm. Having roommates is like starting a tribe… some of my tribes were great, people genuinely got along, we looked forward to seeing each other every day, we went out together, ate together, basically had the best time…
    other times, it was like a military standoff. the livingroom is a DMZ, so no body hangs there, the kitchen feels ‘all the way over there’ and never gets used/cleaned/fragrant/laughed-in, you never know if people are home or not (my personal pet-peeve, i like ‘feeling’ the house, like, which windows are open, is my roommate here, are we leaving any unnecessary lights on?)
    one common misconception i found in my last shared apartment is that girls are clean. WRONG! so wrong… in the end i started sitting down to pee as i could not stand to touch the toilet seat to lift it… also, the force of a standing pee would push this repugnant sulfur smell into the rest of the house. so nasty. typically i’ve found that heterogendered households are far cleaner than monogenders, perhaps for the considerations it might generate, but there are definite exceptions…
    the worst ever was living with a girlfriend… we broke up while cohabiting and she started bringing boys over… it was heartbreaking to find out what an inconsiderate bitch she was.

  16. Paula says:

    I have five flatmates. one moved in because she was a friend, and another is HER friend and the three of us happen to share a kitchen and bathroom so we’re quite close. I’ve had close to 20 flatmates overall in the time i’ve lived here and only bonded with a few so it’s nice to have them around. i don’t really like the other three flatmates but i don’t see them as much. and if i WANT to be on my own, our flat is big enough that i don’t need to see ANYONE. so i feel like i have the best of both worlds . ..

  17. Kristen says:

    I’ve lived with three other girls, and now I live with two girls, one of which I am dating. It usually works out very well, except that my girlfriend and I always have each others backs when it comes to arguments - so that leaves the third roomie feeling somewhat like a third wheel. I enjoy living with my significant other, but I wouldn’t suggest adding a third roommate to the mix! It’s also hard because when my girlfriend and I do get in the occasional argument, the other roommate gets annoyed and quite bitchy. I’m making us sound like we always fight though - and we really don’t! The three of us have a great time together for the most part. I don’t think I could ever live alone… I would go crazy!!

  18. Kaci says:

    I live with my boyfriend and it’s brought us closer together. The arguments are a little bigger - relationship PLUS roommate issues - but I wouldn’t do it any differently. I’ve lived with girls before… three other girls in one apartment and just one other girl in another. And I’ve lived alone. I SO prefer having roommates - you can still have alone time (just go in your bedroom) when/if you want, but there’s people there, usually, too. Love it.

  19. Andrea says:

    I currently live with roommates- 2 guys that I’ve been friends with for a few years. We get along great and we’re all pretty laid-back, so it’s fine and it’s really inexpensive, which is good. But, ultimately, I think I’d prefer to live alone. Our apartment doesn’t really feel like “My Place” because, in reality, it’s NOT. I share it with two other people. So I can’t get as comfortable as I could if it were just mine. That said, if I had to have roommates, these are the ones I want. My only issue is that someone else is always there. I’m never ever home alone, and I like some alone time from time to time. I’m not even there that often. But I almost never have the joy of coming home to an empty house and falling asleep on the couch.

  20. Smilf says:

    I obviously now live with my husband (I’m 27) but I’ve had multiple sitch’s along the way. When I first went to college I lived by myself in an apartment off campus and I LOOOOVED it. I love having my own space and alone time so I couldn’t have imagined living with anyone. Somewhere along the way I lived with 2 of my boyfriends - one in an apartment that we shared and the other in a house that he owned. Both were huge mistakes, but hey, learned from them. In between the two of them and before my husband I again lived by myself. I have to say, I love living with my husband (obviously or I wouldn’t have married him) but sometimes I get a little nostalgic about having my own apartment to go home to at night. I wouldn’t trade it but it still makes me sappy sometimes. :)

  21. A Super Girl says:

    I’ve done all the situations aside from living with a s.o. — rooming blind, rooming with a best friend, rooming with someone I knew a little, and even rooming with someone I found on Craig’s List. Now I live alone. I have to say I enjoyed having roommates and have never had an awful experience, but I’m equally enjoying living alone. No one to clean up after! Total control of the remote! Quiet! Privacy!

    The downside of the living alone though is when you fall down in the shower and can’t get up. Yes this has happened to me, and let me just say, it was scary :-)

  22. miss button says:

    I live with my SO at the mo, but have lived with flatmates, with mr button + flatmates, and with mr button + little sister.
    All were good, but living with just him is by far the best.
    I think living alone would be lonely for me, so this is the best compromise - it’s ‘mine’, but I have someone there to enjoy it with. And he’s tidy, and helpful, and generally awesome, so I can’t imagine it any other way (until we have babies….)!

  23. kim says:

    I have 3 roommates, and it is 2 too many! I would move to a studio or in w/ just ONE person if I could.. but I have 9 more mos on my lease. I’m over the issues of cleaning, dishes, etc. Moving in w/ boys would be easier - but alas - no bf to move in with. So - superfun female roomates it is.

  24. Leah says:

    I lived with roomates all through four years of University, and I must say that they were all great years but I think I was happest in 4th year when I was living with a group of mostly strangers. One girl I knew pretty well, but we were both busy and kept to ourselves except for maybe once a week when we would hang out.
    Now, I live with my boyfriend of three years, and I have never loved living with someone so much. It’s been seven months of “living in sin” and still everyday when I hear his keys jingle in the lock of our small-yet-perfect apartment my heart leaps and I get a big smile on my face. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world and even luckier that both of our Catholic families love both of us so much they are so okay with the situation. Still everyday I feel lucky to be the one that he chooses to come home to, and there is no better feeling than that. (Especially when he is pretending to be rude to me and I get snappy with him and he laughs and tells me that he loves my sassiness. That is love)

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