Dreams, Denise Richards & Dolphins

People who talk about their dreams are actually trying to tell you things about themselves they’d never admit in normal conversation. - Chuck Klosterman

I love that quote.

Because it makes so much sense to me. Telling someone about your wildest dreams is similar to drinking sambuca out of an ice cream pail until things get fuzzy and then admitting that you are SO SUPER PSYCHED for Denise Richards: It’s Complicated, to start up again.

Not that I AM excited, I’m just using that as an example. (But really? I AM SO EXCITED)

Anyway.

I was thinking the other day that I’ve sort of stopped dreaming big. Somewhere along the way my dreams have become rather, practical. Practical. What a dirty, hussy of a word. My dreams are all about finding the perfect teaching job, another hour to get my work done, discovering the match to my lost knee high sock. And dudes? When your WILDEST DREAM involves laundry? It’s time to do a little soul searching.

So in the spirit of impractical, the utterly ridiculous, here are some of my dreams…

- An early season of America’s Next Top Model showed the finalists at some get away where they stayed in a hut that was in the water. There was little plexi-glass cut outs, so you could look down and see the ocean. I want to do that.
- I want to receive a standing ovation. And not one of those pansy ones where people stand because they feel like they have to and everyone claps politely- I want a wolf whistling, cheering until the walls shake sort of standing ovation. I just need to figure out how to earn it.
- I would like to throw a surprise party- one that is talked about as THE surprise party that ended any hope for anyone to try and out party it.
- Throw a drink in someones face. I mean, sure- most people don’t have something that nasty on their ‘dream’ list but it’s always been something I’ve wanted to do. Perhaps because there have been moments where I CLEARLY had the opportunity to, (and even Miss Manners would have approved of the drink throwing), but I have always chickened out.

Things that will never be on my “dream” list: swimming with dolphins, getting a tattoo, riding a motorbike across the country, meeting any particular celebrity (unless it’s Bradley Whitford acting like Josh Lyman- but let’s face it- if Bradley is channeling Josh three years after the show ended just to fulfill some weird fantasy I have… I’m going to be uncomfortable. But I’d probably really like it) and/or jumping out of an airplane.

What would be on your dream list?

26 Responses to “Dreams, Denise Richards & Dolphins”

  1. Angela says:

    I want to play Christine Daae in a Broadway production of the Phantom of the Opera.

    I want to booby-trap someone’s house like in Home Alone.

    Those are my two biggest dreams.

  2. Shaba says:

    That place from ANTM was probably Bora Bora. I’m trying to convince The Boy that it is the PERFECT honeymoon spot.

    I want the leading role in stage play.
    I want to compete in the Olympics.
    I want to dance all night at a New Year’s Eve black tie ball.

  3. Matt says:

    If we ever meet, I’ll let you throw a drink in my face.

    Deal?

  4. bethie says:

    Oh man. I have been feeling aged all morning because I dreamed about the grocery store last night. So thanks for the wake up call to bigger dreams…let’s see…

    I want to make art that people want to have in their homes

    I want to speak German in Germany over at least a months’ time

    Sadly I can’t think of anything else that’s not in some way career related.

  5. sarahdotcom says:

    calgary, summer ‘o7. i’m on a roadtrip with friends. we’re at a club when we run into one of my friend’s mortal enemy. friend immediately walks over to the bar, asks for ‘the cheapest pint of beer available’.
    .. no one orders a pint at a club. knew this wasn’t good.
    (and by ‘wasn’t good’, i mean ‘was going to be AMAZING’)
    friend walks directly over to mortal enemy, taps her on the shoulder, enemy turns around and friend throws the entire pint in her face.
    unfortunately, my friend is a wee little thing, and her enemy has a much longer reach, that ended up breaking friend’s orbital bone.
    conclusion: even with the break, friend says it was one of the best decisions of her life.
    moral of the story: before throwing drinks, spend a week lifting weights.

  6. Peter says:

    I have the hut on the water with the glass floor dream too. I think mine is in Bora Bora.

    In my youth, when I was a serious ac-tor, I was involved in some plays that got standing ovations. It was pretty neat.

    My dream is still to see my name appear in the opening credits of a film. (Following “screenplay by” and not “guest fluffer.”)

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  8. LovelyAnomaly says:

    This always sounds so morbid, but one of my biggest dreams in life is to affect so many lives so that when I die, a tree is planted in my honor.

    Other dreams: Living in London or Ireland and working in a great garden.

    Can you tell I studied horticulture?

  9. Therapeutic Ramblings says:

    -I want to start a research foundation….something that will live on far long than myself.
    -I’d also like to donate a building/scholarship to my alma mater.
    -I want to live comfortably, live happily, and wake up every day with a purpose.

  10. Princess Pointful says:

    I once actually threw a drink on a guy. I was drunk and he pushed my friend. The weirdest thing was, that is the least “me” thing ever. I still can’t believe I did it.
    (and he was such a tool that, despite how angry he was, he forgot and tried to pick me up later than night. Ha!)

    As for actual dreams? I want to learn to scuba dive and live by the water.

  11. kristinblakely says:

    i was going to say what shaba beat me to! bora bora has the glass bottom bungalows.

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