Archive for the 'audience participation required!' Category

Honesty vs. courtesy

Tuesday, July 21st, 2009

Tell me, dear readers, which of the two is worse?
A person who dislikes you for exceedingly petty reasons, yet is overly nice to your face?
Or a person who dislikes you for exceedingly petty reasons and acts cold as ice towards you?
(And, why yes, this is related to my last post, thanks for asking.)

Life, Skills

Wednesday, June 24th, 2009

In junior high school, everyone was required to take Home Economics class, which the oh-so-modernized school system referred to as Life Skills. In eighth grade, everyone took cooking class. I only vaguely remember learning how to make pancakes, but I remember Mike Duke, who sat behind me. He used to wear rock band T-shirts and [...]

Rocking the Vote

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009

In 2004, I voted for John Kerry. I was twenty and proud to be voting in my first presidential election but when I checked the boxes on the absentee ballot that my parents had mailed to my college dorm room, I knew little more about the candidates than their first and last names. I voted [...]

The top ten reasons your job is better than KFC

Tuesday, June 16th, 2009

(Originally guest posted here.)
Lately, I’ve found myself complaining a lot about my job. Words like “understaffed” and “overworked” have been rolling off my tongue. However, when I find myself ruminating a little too much, I just whisper a sentence to myself to make it all seem sunny again.
“At least it’s not KFC.”
Yes, KFC, home of the [...]

This is what happens when you aren’t getting laid

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

The title? Yeah. Let’s not even discuss numbers or time lines. Let’s just say the President wasn’t black the last time I got laid.
Cue ice crunching.
The thing is, other than that minor major physical event- I’m completely happy right now with the relationships I have with people in my life. Without getting into a lot [...]

Time travel

Tuesday, April 14th, 2009

So, apparently spare time and me are not the best of friends at the moment.
As such, I leave you with a question to ponder…
If you could send a slip of paper back in time to your 16 year old self with one bit of advice or wisdom, what would it be?

Memory Lane

Thursday, April 2nd, 2009

Last week, since I had ever-so-delicately sliced my finger open with the blade of a food processer, (and because, OK, you’ve got me, I didn’t actually sit down to write a post until 7:30 AM Friday and thought, I just can’t deal with this right now) my typing was impaired and you were treated to [...]

Discomfort Zone

Wednesday, April 1st, 2009

Like Pavlov’s dogs, I’m learning that certain triggers will send me into an unplanned response. More specifically, certain phrases will send me into a blood curdling, hair tingling, cold and uncomfortable sweat that will prompt me to lie in the fetal position under my bed and drink whiskey until I think I AM Johnny Cash.
Okay, [...]

The one in which I steal Matt’s thunder… or the funnier side of sex.

Tuesday, March 24th, 2009

So.
After seeing “I Love You, Man” this weekend (side note– Paul Rudd? Call me. Awkward men make me swoon), I had fully intended to write about the difficulties in making friends as an adult, without seating charts to make the decisions for you.
But then Matt wrote about sex.
And then I realized that no one would [...]

Dealbreakers

Thursday, March 19th, 2009

Even the most calm, cool and collected of us have idiosyncrasies. Even the most well-dressed, poised and polished person in the room likely has a bad habit, or two, or maybe a nagging anxiety that keeps him or her up at night.  Yet, when searching for a boyfriend, girlfriend or partner we often look for [...]

On Magazines & Lean Cuisines

Thursday, March 19th, 2009

Today I realized that my receipt from the drugstore was a pretty much a direct reflection of my current life situation. Here is what I bought:
- Four magazines (Time, Us Weekly, O- with Michelle Obama on the cover! and Vanity Fair)
- lipgloss
- 5 Lean Cuisine microwave dinners (all the same kind, a frightening chicken/rice combo)
- [...]

It’s Alllllllllllll Good

Thursday, February 26th, 2009

Glamour does a series in their magazine every month about living your best life. In the column, there is a page listing things that women should not feel guilty about doing, because, hey, we all do them. Some examples are: “It’s OK if you eat a whole bag of doritos right before your period and then hide [...]

And then my heart stopped

Thursday, February 26th, 2009

In order for you to understand, you need to quickly read this.
It’s okay, I will wait.
That guy? Let’s call him Jack. And let’s also keep in mind two things, 1) that I’m horrified that I have become a girl who is using blogging to solely discuss a heartbreaking boy situation and 2) that such a [...]

My hypocritical and unsolicited dating advice

Monday, February 23rd, 2009

I posted this last week on my blog, but it seemed to fit pretty well with the theme here, so I decided to do a little double dipping.
***
I have a bit of a secret– I’ve never really dated.
As I’ve remarked before, my adult dating history has been marked primarily by either being in a relationship, [...]

Hey! We need your help!

Thursday, February 5th, 2009

So, we here at Umm… Now What?, are always looking for ways to make the blog better. We’ve decided that one way we can make our digs more exciting is by updating our look. So, we are holding a CONTEST! A BLOG DESIGN CONTEST! Cue the confetti, open the beers, and put on your sweatpants [...]

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